Pity!

Never have I felt this way
Never have I doubted my own say
Feels incomplete, feels wrong
Without the part that makes me, ME.

A cancer it seems like now
Spreading through me
Rotting my inside
Invisible to the naked eye

Everything feels broken, nay, shattered
No medicine to mend
No gum sticking it together
No drug that can make it all better.

Change, they say, is inevitable
But is it acceptable?
I didn’t want to change
I didn’t need the change

Proud I felt looking in the mirror
Disgust I feel looking in the mirror
Cocky I felt looking in the mirror
Pity I feel looking in the mirror

it's time...time to rise India...

I don’t need to give an in depth explanation about why I’m writing this. It’s evident. India and Mumbai were rocked on 26th November by 10 terrorists who had the audacity to open fire on one of Mumbai’s busiest stations, throw grenades and gain control of 2 of Mumbai’s most posh hotels, kill over 200 people and reduce a ‘World Heritage Site’ to nothing but black soot.

Who are we to blame? The country that housed these terrorists, where they trained? Or the laxed navy patrolling? Or the lack of action by the various intelligence wings? Or the Government? Who are we to blame? Is it justified that in answer to hundreds of lives lost all that the politicians have to do is sign on a God damn letter of resignation? Is that all the punishment they deserve?

The political system in India has hit its bottom. I don’t think it can get any worse from here. Did any of you come across a President’s address after such a huge crisis hit India? I know I didn’t. The least we expect from our leaders in such a scenario is that their reassurances, their condolences, etc are flashed on every news channel, is printed on the front page of every newspaper.

But I do not need to dwell upon the failure of our leaders. That fact has been etched in our minds and hearts now. What we need to do is find a solution around this problem. Coz we know, this is not the first time our leaders have failed us, and if we don’t take any radical steps it might not even be the last.

I see rallies being organised, anger being vent out in the press, but these are not substantial steps. For how long will you go on holding rallies? Once the world throws up some other big news, the media will forget this till probably the next year where they will mourn for the dead. The fire will die out and ‘things will be back to normal’.

It is high time we took matters in our own hands. It is high time we stopped being so passive. It is high time we stop expecting someone else to do our duties towards our country. It is OUR country, our home. How can you expect the country to do something for you when you shrug away from all it asks of you? And please please please do not make lame sentences like ‘is desh ka kuch nahi ho sakta’. Is desh ka kuch nahi ho sakta, kyun ki isme tum jaise napunsak rehte hain.

If these blasts are not loud enough to awaken you, I guess you might as well be dead. I see the tide changing now. More and more of my friends are talking about taking a more active interest in the nation’s politics. Simple things like filing the ‘right to information’ petitions can make a huge difference. Why not use it?

But yes, I must say…I am a little apprehensive about this. I don’t know how long this fire is going to last in the common citizen. I hope it does. I sincerely do. We generally wake for someone/something to shake us, shock us and awaken us from our reverie. I hope this will be it. I hope we will rise and make a difference to this country. I hope with all my heart.

the love triangle

I came across this article in the newspaper which spoke about a particular ‘love triangle’ theory of sorts. Frankly at first glance, the theory looked stupid and in a way funny. Maybe it was because of this belief I had/have that ‘love’ is too complicated and the fact that someone could formulate a theory about it just did not go well with me.

For all of those who remember from their earlier studies, we had studied something called as the fire triangle. Well its basic concept was that unless all the 3 constituents of the 3 sides of the triangle are present there cannot be a fire. This theory also stated something similar.

Let me elaborate. The theory states that the 3 constituents are: intimacy, passion and commitment. It states that you have a ‘perfect’ love if you have all 3 of these in the relationship, but various permutations and combinations of these 3 lead to various ‘kinds of love’. To state a few, if your relationship has only intimacy, you’re only friends. If your relationship has only passion, it’s just an infatuation. If your relationship is made up of intimacy and passion, then it’s a romantic love affair. Unfortunately I cannot remember anything related to the commitment part of the triangle .

Anyways, the point I’m trying to make is…can you really form theories and classifications for something like ‘love’. For as far as I can remember ‘love’ has been an undefinable word for me. Each one to themselves. What is love for me may not necessarily mean love for you and vice versa. I will leave you with this line from a song, ‘I love the way you love me, but I hate the way I’m supposed to love you back.’

I for...

I happened to come across one of my friends’(I feel ashamed to call them this) status message which read, ‘Indian government…I hate them’. It doesn’t strike like a very controversial or a very provoking statement. Does it? Well to me, it does. Whatever are the flaws, whatever are the drawbacks of this country, it is MY COUNTRY and I will shower unconditional love and devotion to it.

For every person who has such a point of view or such a complaint, I have only one question…’what have you done for the country?’ Most of these complaining wretches haven’t cast their vote even once in their rotten existence. What gives you the right to condemn and criticise the country thus? You don’t want to be a part of the process to select a government but when someone else does it for you, you have the audacity to abuse them? To criticise them? To condemn them?

Every tom, dick and harry is buying/selling without paying the right taxes. But when the country’s infrastructure grows slowly, ‘yeh India hain…yahan aise hi hota hain’. Yahan aise hota hain, because of people like you. People like you who do not want to contribute to the growth of the country. But sure as hell have a snide comment about the slow growth of the country. Is the government supposed to grow money out of thin air for the various ‘infrastructural growths’ that you want to see in India?

Let’s get one thing straight; you don’t become an Indian just by being born in this country. You have to earn it. Ask not what the country has done for you, ask instead what have you done for the country? Jai Hind!!!

turMoilS

Is it always necessary to act, think or do the ‘right’ thing? How do you define what’s right? How do you differentiate the right from the wrong? Can you differentiate the right from the wrong? I don’t think they are compartmentalised. I don’t think there is a strict line drawn between the two. I think they lead into one another, merge into each other, mix with each other. This is what is commonly referred to as ‘the grey region’. I guess. But you see, even that term has a predominantly negative feel to it. Like you’ve already passed the judgement that grey is as good as black.

There are certain things I would like to do. Certain things that most definitely fall under the grey category (if not the black). So is it still justified to go ahead and do it?
Especially considering that I am aware of this nature of my desires. I mean, if not now when I’m 24 (just turned) and when I have certain amount of leeway with the extent of the mistakes I’m allowed to commit, then when? I do not want to act upon the wisdom gained by over 40 years of life when I still have over 15 years to get there. It’s all confusing. Very confusing. And very very questionable of course.

Isn’t this supposed to be the time when I am all carefree and doing as I please? Forget about ‘supposed’ to be. This is what I want to be doing. Are there any guidelines, any rules, or any such thing we need to be following? When do we know that ‘it’s time now.’ When?

we believe...

Why is everyone trying to impose their beliefs, their principles on everyone else? It’s not necessary that I should agree with you or share your beliefs. And it definitely is not necessary that if my beliefs differ from yours you should put in every ounce of energy you have in changing my beliefs to yours (or vice versa). It’s high time we learnt to accept different opinions, beliefs and principles. Of course we feel our beliefs are right and the corollary that their beliefs are wrong. But if that person ‘believes’ it…he must also think he is right. He might not be able to explain it. He might not be as good with expression of his thoughts as you are and maybe half as good as you are with convincing people. That doesn’t make him wrong or you right.

There are still a million phenomena occurring all around us for which we have no logical explanation. But still they occur. Maybe his beliefs have something to do with these unexplainable occurrences. This is just one of the possible reasons I’m trying to put across to bring about this change in attitude. Maybe it’s stupid. Maybe you can come up with a better explanation. As long as you can accept difference.

Variety, they say, is the spice of life. This is the precise reason why we need various points of view, various sets of principles and various opinions. All the discussions need not end with ‘either you convince me, or get convinced’. Just imagine, it would be such a monotonous life if all of us had just one view on everything. Say for example, if all of us thought that Sachin Tendulkar should retire. What would the media write about everyday then? Rather what would you read about everyday? What would form the dinner table conversation of most of the houses in India? But these are petty topics. Topics that don’t affect our life in an explicit manner. Therefore we can afford these differences. Why not the same outlook for other matters? So proudly we read the slogan which signifies the Indian strength ‘unity in diversity’, then why is there a lack of spirit to accept the diverse beliefs? Why?

atheist accounts continues...

In my last post I had criticised the current scenario pertaining to religion in India. I figured no criticism is complete, unless you point out what is wrong, and how it can or should be corrected. I’m certain we’re way past the point of return. But the prospective benefits are so humongous that it’s worth a try.

I have come across many people who sit in temples or in front of their idols at home for hours on ends. You would call them religious, I don’t. And because I don’t, I’m an atheist. But what we fail to notice is that these people neglect their duties as a mother/father, as a wife/husband, as a HUMAN BEING in the course of decorating their idols and spending hours just admiring their God’s ‘beauty’. Is this religion? Is this the way ‘God’ would want us to live. They will have a hundred maligning thoughts in their minds, a thousand ill wishes for other people, a million pervert desires, but they are religious people.

It’s not like I’m against idol worship. I also join my hands and pay respect to the idols of Gods and Goddesses. What I’m against is IDLE IDOL WORSHIP. It just doesn’t make sense. What do you think? The God that you’re trying to ‘impress’, is he going to get more impressed by you wasting all your time in decorating his idol or if you use that same time to do some good for your family, friends or mankind? I don’t think God is so selfish. He/She wouldn’t be ‘God’ if he/she was.

It’s high time we paid humanity its due attention. It’s high time we stopped discriminating people based on religion. Religions are mere paths leading to the same destination. In today’s scenario, religions have become paths to divert mankind from the desired destination and lead him away to an unhappy ending. There really is no other religion greater in reach than humanity.

attempt at poetry

The re-re-re-return

I buried it once, I buried it twice
But the tombstone still
Pokes out of the ground
Troubling me, haunting me.

No amount of reasoning can
Quench this tremendous fire
More that I feel its stupid
Stronger is the desire.

A dream it was, a desire it was
Stronger than any I had felt before
But courage I had not, to realise it
The dream that is filling me once more.

atheist accounts

A few days back I paid a visit to Tirupathi, the renowned religious hub. Yes, I chose the word ‘hub’ on purpose because that is what it has become, a place of commercial activity and high money transactions. It is ‘supposed’ to be holy land, a place where we remember and give praise to God. But what I witnessed there has opened my eyes to the true picture of religion in our country.

We forget the basic etiquettes, the fundamental behaviour that we’re supposed to display as the most civilised species. We start behaving worse than animals, and the best part is we consider these people to be the most devotional and religious. Frankly, it disgusts me to see people behave like this.

How can you push and shove elders who can barely stand on their own feet in the name of religion? How can you push children around so that you reach the idol before they do in the name of religion? How can you touch various parts of women in the name of religion? Is this what you call religion? Is this what you call devotion? If this is your definition of religion and devotion and God, then I will gladly be called an Atheist.

fresher to CEO overnight - the perks and the fucks

I had slept the last night thinking the world of opportunities was out there, up there for me to grasp, after all I was practically still a fresher. But the next morning I woke up a CEO. Yes, I’m not kidding. That’s how I describe my ‘so called’ transition. As sudden as that. For a long long time I did not know how to react to that. People were beaming with confidence, that I would do a wonderful job. Mind it; people were beaming with that kind of confidence not me. The biggest problem and fuck up is, because of the existent set up there are no defined parameters to assess whether I am doing a decent job (wonderful job is really out of question).

It does sound very sudden and rash and illogical to do something like this. But you haven’t heard the best part yet. There is logic to support this rashness, this madness. In all the big companies, when one CEO is retiring and another is coming in his place, the earlier one does not spend 2-3 months with the new one to explain how things work. Even that happens suddenly. Probably on a personal level not as sudden as my case, but as far as the company is concerned, it is as sudden.

Well, you see then I was soooo ‘dazzled’ by this proposition that the phrase ‘the cat’s caught its tongue’ fits like a glove. Now I see the loophole in this ‘logic’ as clear as the bright burning sun. THE NEW CEO HAD ALL THE PRIOR EXPERIENCE HE NEEDED TO MAKE THE SUDDEN TRANSITION. He/she had been there done that before. He has all the qualifications needed to replace the outgoing CEO. We clearly chose to ignore this small little teeny weeny detail.

Imagine everyday someone asking you, ‘did you do this?’; ‘did you do that?’….and always the answer is NO. Why? For the plain simple reason that you did not know it was supposed to be done. But somehow that person expects you to know all this, because he/she knows it. It’s shitty, the way you feel and when you have to bow down your head in shame and disgust at your incompetence. It makes you feel like such a dummy. You have to call someone or the other every half an hour or so to ask how it is to be done. Or how it was done? (really, what is the difference?). If you want to ever drain yourself of every drop of confidence you have in you, try this. Trust me it gives wonderful results. I guarantee you will have to dig real deep to find a pinch of what was once confidence.

This is not all, put your self in the place of an employee of the company who has been in the industry for atleast 3-4 years (atleast, you will obviously come across veterans too). And imagine receiving orders or reporting to someone who has practically just stepped out of college. I wouldn’t like it. I don’t know if they feel the same way or not. But every time I turn my back to them. I can feel their laughter.

Did the title mention ‘perks’? Oh yes there are perks. Unimportant, materialistic perks like come and go as you please, AC car to drive around in, fancy mobile phone, etc. It feels stupid to weigh them against peace of mind and confidence. But as you chose, so shall you act. And act your best you should. So be it.

bad 'air' day...

It’s a phenomenon that has haunted each one of us, some time or the other. The feeling is pathetic. If there is any room, any room at all below ‘rock bottom’ this is the day it surfaces. Every decision feels wrong. Not just the ones taken on this day, but even the ones taken before, or the ones going to be taken later. Self doubt fills every pore of the body. Whatever little space is left out is filled with disgust (at nothing), guilt (for nothing), anger (on nothing) and a sense of foreboding. Feels like happiness has been drained out. Bone dry. Like it is just a figment of imagination. Not really present, never was and never will be. It’s a distant concept, one that the mind will never be able to fathom and understand and accept. It feels like the air itself is poisoned. Poisoned with the drug of sadness. Bad Air Day.

Wet sand...

I still remember that day like it was yesterday. As vividly as the day when I graduated. The date was…don’t you just hate such people? Those who can remember the date and time of every little insignificant event of their lives. The ‘Subodhs’. On the contrary, it was a regular, boring, ‘nothing to do’ day. And I was doing precisely that… ’nothing’. Getting bored out of my wits, sitting at home. I had watched all the television I could in one day (or one life maybe). I needed something better, something ‘more’ constructive (more?? What more?? There is no comparison…just constructive), something worthwhile to do. But unfortunately there was nothing else to do. I was jobless (yet again), looking for a job in a completely unfamiliar field (yet again), and I was lonely (yet again and again and again). I felt worthless, loser, and like a ‘dharti pe bojh’.

Luckily some friends called me, and I was rescued from the confines of ‘my own prison’…(for all you ignorant people, that’s a song). I got into an auto rickshaw to get to the meeting point. Just a couple of minutes into the ride it starts pouring outside. The first rain. I love the first rain. The smell of ‘wet sand’ (oh my god! How ignorant can you get…even that is a song…develop a taste people). It’s heavenly. Science says the first rains are bad for you, as it carries all the acids that were present in the atmosphere. Balls to science!!! The first rains are the best thing that ever happened. I could feel all the tension, all the worries just getting washed away with the rains. (Just a crazy stupid thought, probably tension and worries are basic, that is why the acidic rains wash them away). In any case I was suddenly feeling brilliant. Just when I was beginning to enjoy the rains and my spirits were beginning to rise, my rickshaw stalled. Apparently it’s not used to the rains. Rain pouring down with a fury, trying to prove a point, that it’s comeback time. And I’m stuck in the middle of a busy road, in a rickshaw. And believe it or not, instead of enjoying the rain, instead of getting down and splashing around like we used to when we were kids, when we were filled with innocence, what is the only thought crossing my mind. ‘My cell phone is going to get screwed’. Can you believe it? I could not. How high tech has infringed upon the simple joys of our lives. It’s sad, pathetic but omni present. Unfortunately. Anyways, I was not going to let something as insipid as this to rob the joy, the thrill, the pure unadulterated happiness Mother Nature was bestowing upon me (Oh my god!!). All I had to do was get a plastic bag, (irony: mother nature bestowing happiness, and me using ‘plastic’ to enjoy that happiness) to safely put my cell phone into. Eureka. Problem solved. Once that ‘daunting’ task was accomplished, I walked a little more than a kilometre in the rain, graciously offered my cab to a family, took a lift from an unknown person on a bike (and trust me, bike rides in the rain…SCARY), finally got into another rickshaw and met my friends. Oh and yes, the first thing I made them do, check if my phone was ok!!!

weak and powerless...

Tilling my own grave to keep me level
Jam another dragon down the hole
Digging to rhythm and the echo of a solitary siren
One that pushes me along and leaves me so…
Desperate and ravenous
I’m so weak and powerless…

These lyrics of the song titled ‘weak and powerless’ by ‘a perfect circle’ echoing in my head are the cause of the splitting headache, of the bad temper, of the fuck all mood that I am in. There are a set of people you derive energy from. Their belief in you, their encouragement… that is the fuel. And what do you do when that fuel tank shows empty? It’s a horrible feeling, so vulnerable, so unsure, unsafe, so…’weak and powerless’. Where to look for the drive now? Whom to turn to? It feels claustrophobic. No where to go, no one to turn to. The path ahead is hazy and the path behind is lost. It feels like it would have been better if there were no desires, ambitions, wishes, passions. The choices would have been so much simpler. The path would have been so much clearer. Will such a day ever come? Ever?

dream on...

How important is it for you that your dream comes true? How far are you ready to go? How much risk are you ready to take? For how long can you bear everyone doubting your conviction? When is it that you stop chasing some stupid (in others’ eyes) dream? These are questions that for some reason have no legitimate answer. Although for you, the answer holds great importance, but unfortunately (or fortunately) there is no ‘right’ answer to them.

I was just flipping through the channels when I came across this medieval times movie starring Anil Kapoor, Utpal Dutt (the golmaal guy), and others called Saheb (obviously this is the movie that sparked those questions). The movie is about Saheb (Anil Kapoor) who has a dream to become a footballer. He’s not from a well to do family and therefore is constantly ridiculed and criticised for not taking up a job and chasing this stupid dream. He’s tremendously passionate about football and dreams day and night about it. Now, his younger sister is to get married and his father can not afford the wedding. I’m not going to dwell on the unnecessary (not truly unnecessary, it’s a brilliant build up) occurrences. What Saheb does is, he goes and sells his kidney so that his sister can get married and be rid of the feeling of guilt that she is going to be responsible for a huge debt on her father’s head. He does it knowing very well that he will never ever be able to play football professionally with one kidney. Knowing that the one thing he had dreamt of day and night will not come true.

So this brings us back to the queries I had posed earlier. When do you stop chasing your dreams? Should you stop chasing your dreams ever? There are also those of us who believe that come what may, whatever difficulties we face, whatever hardships we have to endure, we should always follow our dreams. ‘If life gives you thorns, you make do with thorns. You do not brood on their nature, colour, length, sharpness. Instead you pluck them and keep walking, on bloody feet if you have to.’ Those who have such beliefs aren’t wrong. There is more than just white and black here.

A 'new' Cinderella story...(and this time it's a man)

“Yes”. That was the answer that started it all. The dreaming, the planning and all that jazz. What was the question? “Will you go to the prom with me?” I studied four long years in that college and we had prom only once. It wasn’t an extraordinary event (at least not for the 200 other people there) but it was still ‘prom’. She didn’t say yes because she liked me, she didn’t say yes because there was no one else to go to the prom with, the only reason she said yes was because I was the first to ask her. Kinda sad right? Well, it was still a memorable night. Since the day she had agreed, I had been dreaming of the night. Playing it in my mind back and forth, again and again. The reality was…hmmm…how do I put it…’little’ close to what I had dreamed….oh forget it who am I trying to kid…it was nothing like I had dreamed. The first problem…what do I wear? I had nothing good enough. I knew it for a fact she would be looking stunning (even more than ever). I had to at least look worthy of her (if not better). I practically went to every mall, every shop, visited every brand's showroom that is located between santacruz and lower parel. Budget was never an issue. Finally I struck gold at Pantaloons, lower parel. It was just the shirt. I laid eyes upon it and knew it was perfect. ‘Slim fit’. The next problem….How do I manage to go together to the prom? As in, not jus meet up outside the venue…’go together’. Call me orthodox if you will, but I deemed it my responsibility to pick her up from her home and take her to the prom. That’s where my good friend and his car come into the picture. He gave me his car (minus him) to go pick her up. I went to her home and called her up and asked her to 'descend'. Finally, the moment arrived. Believe me when I say this, she was looking…hmmm…how do I put it, ‘stunning’ will be an understatement. She was looking like a princess. My ‘princess’ for the night (and if I had my way, a lot longer) had arrived. I had planned to get her a rose, which of course I forgot. What do you think I am? Perfect? I took as long as I could to reach the prom from there. I wanted to spend as much time possible with her alone. I knew once we reached the prom my magical night would end. She would be swept away by the rest of my friends (I call them friends in retrospect only). That is precisely what happened….my brief, short and sorry fairy tale came to an abrupt end on arrival at the college campus (yes, that’s where we had our prom…I told you it wasn’t an extravagant event). But those few moments together were simply breathtaking.

My first Ad!!!

I know the art work is a bit shabby...I've only just started working with Photoshop.I'm trying to improve my skills there. besides that if you have anything to say...you know what to do...

Is it worth it??

It’s quiet pointless, the route we take in our lives. What stream we choose for our XII, which degree we struggled for, which career path we trod upon. It all comes down to whether we’re happy doing what we’re doing (or maybe not doing). It comes down to whether we’re doing what we’re doing to the best of our capabilities, with all the passion we possess or doing it just because we have to. Ironically, it’s not the route we take that decides our destination, but it’s the number of milestones we have crossed, the milestones that we set, not someone else. Not our friends, not our family. But then, it’s not so fucking easy. Obviously, there are a million complications. Infinite hurdles. And unfortunately there is no solution to most of these complications other than ‘compromise’. We compromise once, twice, and before we know it we’re not who we wanted to be. We look at others and envy them, coz they had the courage, the balls to put their foot down, to stop compromising and do what they wanted to, become what they wanted to become. Of course, they had to struggle a lot, but wasn’t it worth it? Isn’t it worth it? Is it worth it?

finally...

You don’t really know or realise what you have missed, what you have been longing for till you actually get it. It felt so perfect, so right, so deserving. I used to love it. In fact in those childish days I used to actually call it my first and only love. Then somewhere, something went wrong and it disappeared. You remember those old Hindi movies where two ‘bichde hue bhai’ reunite. And the reaction they give when they realise they’re brothers (I don’t think there is a more exaggerated show of pure happiness). That is precisely how I felt. And believe me I’m not exaggerating. It was almost as if adrenaline was carrying my blood rather than the other way round. I felt exalted, elevated, liberated. It was a feeling I had never felt before. The feeling I had missed for so long. The feeling ‘yes, this is where I belong’, the instant connection, the belief, the rush...of finally playing basketball.

kachra!

‘Do not spit here’, ‘No littering’, etc. These are a couple among the various signs that you read and conveniently ignore. It enrages me. You, the so called ‘civilised’ population of India, behave in the most uncivilised manner. I’m sure you have a ready excuse if confronted, ‘the government is not doing its job, there should be a dustbin here’ or ‘where are the sweepers? The Municipality does absolutely no work’. Why don’t you take a look around, there is a dustbin at less than 50 metres from where you stand. How the fuck can you make such an excuse? You don’t even want to take a couple of extra steps to keep your country clean. (I’m not even going to dwell on the subject of saving our environment with this insolent group). And then to top it all, you go to a foreign country and go gaga over how clean that city/country is. You have the bloody audacity to pass such a comment. You make all the possible contributions to maintain your country as dirty as possible and remark on the beauty and cleanliness of other countries?? And what is your reasoning?? ‘Mere akele ke nahi karne se thodi kuch hota hain’. It’s because every goddamn person thinks like this that no one does it. Change starts with YOU. I’m not asking you to propagate this message, (that is hoping for too much), but atleast do your part. Don’t add to the already abundant garbage lying on the roads of our beautiful country. ‘Kuch toh sharam karo, thoda kachra kam karo!!’

A 'subtle' reminder...

Am I writing this blog for you to read it, for someone to read it and give me a job or for my personal satisfaction? That’s the question that’s been screwing up my head for the past week or so. I wanted it to be for myself, for my satisfaction, a relief valve for all the pressure that builds in the course of something called life (or existence). But somewhere in the conceiving phase there was an error, a short circuit (shot). It became a self analysis tool. I was asking for comments, nay, I was practically begging for them. I care a fuck about your comments. I don’t care whether you like what I’m writing or not (unless of course if you can get me a job based on this). I don’t care if you think the topics of my blog are too stupid or pointless. The last thing I need right now is to analyse myself through someone else’s eyes. I WILL DO what I want to. I will write whatever the hell I want to. This is MY blog.

READ this...

‘Books padha karo, it’s a very good habit’…I’m sure every one of us has heard this phrase thrust in our faces (maybe in varied languages) hundreds of times. I’m not going to deny or try to contradict the truth in that. But yes, I am going to try to bring to light the fact that it’s easier said than done (among other random comments I’m going to make).

I do believe that a lot depends on the childhood phase of our lives. You can’t expect someone who has never read any book other than what the curriculum prescribes to suddenly grab a book and become an ardent reader. It takes grooming, developing taste, identifying the genre that you enjoy the most, etc. It should not be a one day, one week, one month or a year's stint; you have to keep at it. You have to, like I mentioned earlier develop the habit, groom yourself.

From what I have noticed, I believe there are 3 kinds of readers. First, those who enjoy reading in their free time. Then there are those who I like to call ‘compulsive readers’. These are the ones who HAVE TO read everyday. They take special efforts to find time to read something or the other. They are the ones that are truly very passionate. There are also those readers who read only the ‘best sellers’ or maybe just one series or author. Well I didn’t find them worthy enough to dedicate a category to them. There is also another kind of readers, but frankly I haven’t come across many who belong ‘purely’ to this category. These are the ones that randomly walk into a bookstore, look around the store, spend over a couple of hours looking for a book, not knowing what they’re looking for, and might even walk out of the store without picking up anything. They can’t read any book, unless that book ‘calls out’ to them. Its not that they have to find the book interesting…no no no…the book has to call out to them, the reader has to identify a bond with the book. They can’t read a book even if a hundred people tell them that a certain book is worth a read unless they identify the bond.

I know most of you are going to think ‘what nonsense’ or ‘its just an excuse to not read’…but those who have felt this bond, those who have experienced this feeling will know what I’m talking about.

In any case, I strongly believe reading should be developed as a habit. And I don’t mean comics or magazines. I mean reading ‘sound literary substance’. Maybe it is because I am very passionate about languages, be it English or Hindi. While we’re at the topic of books, and reading ‘sound literary’ books…I would like to recommend ‘the Ramayana’ series by Ashok Banker and if any of you fancy a good Hindi read, there is a collection of short stories callled ‘gadhyanjali’ (yes, all you ICSE students…our old text book). Happy reading!!!

mum-BAI blues

It’s a very difficult life living alone in Mumbai. Some people think…well let me put it this way, most people think it's all fun, you get unlimited freedom, come home as and when you like, leave home when you please…but no one seems to see the flipside to it. I agree the cons don’t compare to the pros…but the point is THERE ARE cons. Take for example the topic of discussion in this post. ‘BAIs’. It is impossible…and trust me I have a lot of experience here…it is impossible to find a bai that will satisfy all your needs (for people with exceptionally dirty minds, I didn’t mean what you were thinking). First of all, since you live alone they think why in the name of God would you want a spotless house or clean utensils or washed clothes. They think living alone is a synonym of living dirty. No matter how many times you tell them, how many times you warn them, they will still not satisfy you (don’t wander…stay with me). They know that we bachelors are too lazy to fire them and then go out looking for another bai who will also work only as efficiently as the previous one. Then there is this everlasting issue about food. Finding a bai who can cook good food is like finding the Holy Grail. Impossible. And then after you have tried their food and asked them to stop cooking anymore but still do the other chores of the house…oh my God! It’s like war. After that they will make it a point to screw up. And then show absolutely no remorse when you do reprimand them. Basically, the point is…I’m very flustered with my bai. So if any of you know of an efficient bai in the 7 bungalows area…please let me know.

ATTENTION!!

I would be posting at least one post every day...if you find them interesting...please keep visiting...even if you don't find them interesting...still please visit to criticise...and if you have any random topics you think I should or I could write upon...please let me know...I want to push my writing skills to the limit...

Career Counselling

:)...I couldn’t help but give this title to my first post. Those of you who know me will know what I am talking about. I’m foraying into the darkness and danger...yet again...changing the direction of my career...(probably a different plane altogether) and subsequently my life. Most people believe (and trust me they have every right to do so) that I have a highly 'unstable' mind...that I’m too finicky. Well, at this moment I don’t have any argument to counter that. In any case, this post is to try and encourage, try and instil the desire in you to follow your dreams. I’m not saying it's an easy path to trod upon, I’m not saying I have done it. But I am trying to...and believe me just the prospect of doing something I love, of becoming someone that I have dreamt of becoming right from when I was maybe 4 years old...is exhilarating. I am, so to say petrified of one thing...when I am, say about 40 years old...I will look back at my life and say...'maybe I would have been happier if I had done this'. You will not regret what you did, you will regret what you DID NOT do. So I urge you to go out there and do what you want to do...become what you want to become...chase your dreams...and they WILL come true!!

kripya dhyan dijiye!!

Hey...i've ben waiting and wanting to do this for a long long time...
WRITE...for the heck of it, for the fun of it, and now for making a career out of it...crticism is encouraged...and appreciation is encouraged even more. for those of you who were not paying enough attention in their hindi classes...'alp viram' is a comma...literally, it means 'pause'...